"I am an instrument in the shape
of a WOMAN trying to translate pulsations
into images
for the relief of the body
and the reconstruction of the mind."

written by Adrienne Cecile Rich

Friday, June 01, 2007

gently strolling...

it's not so simple to fall for another again. sometimes i think i may be doing the wrong things that i swore not to repeat again. but i'm more careful this time around.

being more careful now is utterly important, since i'm again treading on deep waters. i don't know what to think, because i may be here for the wrong reasons.

he's so my opposite: he thinks first before he jumps in. i'm the adventurous one, so i usually get myself in lots of messes.

he said he didn't want to hurt me, that's why he's taking the time to think about things. he doesn't want to go on ahead without knowing which direction to take. this is what i like about him--he takes the time to reflect on what to do next.

i, on the other hand, am no better at this. i was surprised that he took the time to think about this for the both of us. i like the way he treats me, and for that he has brownie points.

he looks out for the consequences that might turn up, because these are inevitable. people would talk. that's what we're both afraid of. mostly that's what i'm afraid of.

i want to be here for the right reasons, not just be here simply because i like the companionship but not the companion. i want to be sure of my feelings first. also, i want to make sure that mom and dad like him (which was something i overlooked in the past).

i can't talk about love as yet. sometimes it's not just about that.

it's a nice feeling to be here once again, to be appreciated and to be cared for. to be cared for, mostly, since, from how i know him, he does a very good job of that.

p.s. he's so nice.


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Saturn's precious star
the elder sister
a squirrel under the oak
never early
Venus' healing herb
la luna de la noche
a girl of wishes
pride inside
pretending to be smart
nicely tucked in
a lady not poised
the talahiranya

Location: San Juan, Philippines

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