"I am an instrument in the shape
of a WOMAN trying to translate pulsations
into images
for the relief of the body
and the reconstruction of the mind."

written by Adrienne Cecile Rich

Saturday, March 17, 2007

sniff chuff

haven't been able to post lately, for the simple reason of having too much time away from my computer. wapak. i'm back.

march is not yet over, so i think this post fits the season. i'm ranting, and this post is not for the below-eighteen or the conservative. if you're one of these, please cover your eyes with your fingers, or press alt+f4 on your keyboard.

i am disgusted at the fact that a company has been capitalizing on the "scent" of a woman.

oh yes, i have to provide the public with an introduction to the product, if it should be called as such.

it's called vulva original. for lack of descriptives, i would rather the product say what it is: vulva original beguiles the senses with the scent of a real vagina, thus opening up completely new vistas for enhancing your sex life. vulva original lets you enjoy the scent of a woman anytime you want. it’s easy to use: shake the vulva vial well, and the fluid is also transformed to optically resemble the object of every man’s desire. then apply it to the back of your hand and sniff. your libido will take care of the rest all by itself.

who's vulva is it from? what makes it original anyway?

ew. i'd like to think my abyss smells different from the one next door.

i remember watching one episode in nat geo about pheromones and such, about the scent of one woman is different from another since the scent identifies one's genes. this unique scent is either attractive or repulsive to a man, depending on the genes it identifies.

hm, i'm not sure about this scientific part, but yep, one lady would protest that her coochie's "fragrance" is quite different from the rest (if not, she'd even tell you that hers smells better, haha).

it's a good thing, though, that this product is only available in germany and the uk (from the last i heard).

anyway, capitalizing on it, would there be other product lines, such as asian vulva original (which carries chinese, japanese, korean, filipino, etc), or american vulva original which comes in black and white?

and who profits from this product? are there smell-testers? did they use animal testing? who gets to say which vulva smells better?

the product's website address is also so cheesy... www . smell me and . com? what about smell me and throw up? come on! [pun not intended].

i'd like also to warn the men. applying this scent to the back of your hand, just like applying any perfume to your wrist, would most probably make you reek of chuff. it may "enhance" your libido, but try getting into an elevator full of high-testosteroned barakos. use your imagination.


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Saturn's precious star
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a squirrel under the oak
never early
Venus' healing herb
la luna de la noche
a girl of wishes
pride inside
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