rewiring my circuits

later comes the year ahead.

why can't i procrastinate time, and tell it, "come back later, when i'm up to doing stuff. i feel like lazing around today, so don't come today, okay?"

sooner comes the year.

gawd. can't believe it's already near! i'm also turning another year older this 2007 (of an age i won't admit, of course). my older cousins joked that you'll know you're getting older when you receive lesser and lesser presents at reunions every year, from loads of plastic bags to one bag to an armful to a handful.

my batchmates are graduating, and i'm still left stuck in school. so many wonderful semesters ahead.

i don't want the year to some yet. it's like death. i'm not yet ready. so many things i still want to do in 2006 but so little time! i'm cramming my end of the year, because i lazed through 2006.

okay, maybe not lazed through. but still.

so here i introduce myself (which i probably should have done a long time ago). i'm a researcher. i look into the meanings and makings of people and society. haha. i want to know what you know, what you think, what you can and can't do, and what you feel about the things around you. basically that sums it up.

i want to learn about you.

i have done a mighty fine job of breezing through research papers without really realizing the worth it has for me, for the treasure of knowledge i could gain. hopefully i won't be like that again this year.

i want to connect with people through what they know, what they think, and what they feel. i want to know so i can better understand, and through my understanding i could make other people learn through my writings and papers.

wow, in a few short moments of introspection i'm finally enlightened on my raison d'etre. hahaha.

i am not much of a maker of resolutions, as i don't really try. also, this is not a resolution, but a new outlook in life. i'd like to publish here my papers, findings, analyses, or writings. i'm not letting go of the daytime musings i have, but hopefully i can share with you insights into humanity (with scientific/social scientific basis, of course!). and hopefully i won't bore you, as the research process can be a total bore if the final analysis and results have been presented. haha.

but now, since it's still not 2007, i'm back to regular programming, and off to finish homework before classes open next week.

coming soon: what really do kids think about boys in skirts?

snow cones

as i was getting listess and couldn't post something worthwhile in this blog, i thought of sharing this short sudden fiction i wrote for a class a while back. it saves me time to write, plus i only have to copy-paste. haha. the setting is right for this season, but i don't know what this fiction means to everybody else, so please comment. hehe. merry christmas to everybody!

________

When she saw the ice on the cone with the red sparkles on them, her eyes misted in memory of her favorite sweet when she was four years old. It was only then that she remembered that bright red color on the white ball of snow.

It was January, and the decorations of the past Christmas still hung on the walls outside the houses of the neighbors. They were taking down their decorations that weekend, with her father at the top of the ladder holding the large parol.

His head was above the parol and he smiled at her. “How do I look Monnie?”

“You look silly, Dad. Really silly. The star is too big for you.”

“Is that so? Then I’ll wear the smaller parol, the one you made in school last November.”

“Ha ha ha, that’s too small, even for your head.”

“But I like that parol.”

“I hate that parol, Daddy, it’s too green.”

By now, her father was trying to climb down the ladder with the big parol of yellow, red, blue, and green. That parol used to sparkle a thousand lights during the evenings, the colors dancing with the stars, parading its luminescence across the neighborhood.

“Hey, Monnie, hold on to the ladder, will you? I’m going to come down now.”

“Okay, Daddy, but please wait a small while. I’m trying to get my hand out of this knot.”

The lights that hung around their house cost them a fortune in electric bills, but it was a pleasure to her father to see her gleam at the sight of those dancing little orbs, the brightest of which hung in the very middle outside the house.

“I’m holding on to the ladder now, okay.”

Monica couldn’t see her father’s face now, because it was covered by the large parol he was holding. Only his hands were visible.

No snow rained in the suburbs of this country, but whenever Monica sees the lights she remembers the song White Christmas because it was frequently played on the radio during the –ber months.

“I’m coming down, I’m going down. Okay, I’m going down.”

Daddy fell. He fell backwards onto Monnie. He fell to the ground.

And Monnie saw her father’s red blood on the white skirt she was wearing. His bright, pretty, red blood on the white, like Santa Claus in the snow. His head landed on her lap.

Her mother, by this time, had rushed out the door, calling her. “Monnie! What happened?”

“Daddy? Are you okay?”

“I’m okay, dear, just a scratch.” Her father got up. He kissed Monnie on the forehead. “My little angel, what would I do without you?”

Monica, by now, didn’t remember what happened after that. She didn’t remember that her father needed stitches and fractured an arm while she sat quietly in the hospital corridor.

What she did remember, though, was her first snow cone they got right after.

11 things i'd like to have for christmas

i can feel the cold breezes at night--it's really nearing christmas!

because i feel like a kid now, i'm writing my christmas wish list and hopefully santa hops along and gives me at least one in this list (as long as i keep from being naughty... hehe).

11 things i'd like to have for christmas

1. a brian culbertson album and/or a chris botti album - i was introduced to smooth jazz through my brother jj and the trumpeteer chris botti. when i heard brian culbertson, i fell in love. there's always something romantic or sensuous about his compositions. i feel giddy and romantic and inspired when i put on his music as i study. oooh. his music always make me think of tall, dark-eyed, sexy gentlemen, or lunch picnics outside in the sun, or lilies, or all of them at once. chris botti's music is more sensual, and still reminds me of sexy gentlemen, but scenes of candlelit dinners, midnight rendevouz, and long-stemmed roses comes to mind.
   
2. an aquarium full of ciclids - these fishes are like dogs--they would follow my finger whenever i tap the top of the aquarium. i think it's a reflex from thinking that fingers bring fish food. they're really cute, i hope they never grow large. hehe. and having an aquarium really soothes me, one thing i need during hell days.
   
3. a recorder - i've been wooing my dad for this. the old recorder is already broken, and this recorder is more of a need, especially when i do interviews and focus group discussions (my dad just bought me one last weekend! woohoo! thanks, dadi).
   
4. a GC for shoe shopping (no, make that a shoe-shopping spree) - every girl loves shoe shopping! i've been eyeing the pair of red peep-toe wedges as a gift for myself this christmas. and the kitten-heeled tan sandals i saw last week are really pretty. if i had my way, i'd buy them all! wasn't it imelda who said, "when they opened my closet, thankfully they saw shoes, not skeletons."
   
5. a weekend trip to palawan - and immerse myself in all the beauty of creation. i absolutely adore beaches. kel, who comes from zambales, thinks nothing of it. he says i'd be bored if all my gimiks are limited to resorts and nearby beachfronts. i love beaches! for someone like me who lived all her life in the city (and not knowing the life in the province, since i never had one), that would be bliss. make that a whole-week trip to palawan. i'd like to go hiking, too!
   
6. a box of samba - ooh, everytime i'm in AS, i drop by the store at the AS walk and buy loads of samba. i like samba better than other chocolates. i feel really good inside when i munch on it. it tastes so good that i know i could live on it. need i say more? hehe.
   
7. the talent to sing - what i would give so i can learn how to sing without scaring anyone off. i truly believe i wasn't gifted with music, or even the ear for music, so i can at least sing in tune. and even if i take lessons (which i did, but never finished), i'd never develop it. *sigh*
   
8. my very own photo-shoot - haha. dolled up in so many fancy clothes, make-up, end everything else? why wouldn't i want that? be like a star! hahaha.
   
9. mernel's chocolate cake - one of the things that i missed in my elbi days. mernels. so chocolatey-thick. so rich. yumyum. kel and i used to eat one small cake while we hung out at the carabao park, while we chat or while he strums on a guitar and i listen. i miss those days. i miss mernels. haha.
   
10. a puppy - i wish i had a terrier. and i hope my dad would allow me to keep it. i'd probably pamper it, dress it up, brush its hair whenever i could, and feed it so much it'd be obese. hehe. kidding. i really want a terrier.
    
11. a digicam - if i'm in santa claus land i'd probably be asking for the sony dsc-n2, which costs 6x more than my one semester tuition fee. so i'm wishing for the dsc-s500. it's just as good, though not necessarily as costly but with lesser features. bah, what i want is simply its function: something to take digital pictures with to share with my friends and family. hehe.

selling water at sunken grandstand

what i thought would be a normal medical mission day turned out to be one of those notable, almost-embarrassing-but-not-quite, learning experiences in UP.

okay, here goes. i didn't wake up to the ear-splitting sound of my alarm, so i was really late when my mom came up to my room to wake me up. i had to rush to buy ice for the cooler to keep the bottles of water cold. we were supposed to sell water at the medical mission, for a little fund-raiser, but when i got there, many patients already finished with their medical exams and only few were left to sell water to (and that was still 7.30 in the morning!).

i was getting worried that we wouldn't be able to sell at least half of those water bottles. it would be a waste of effort, time, money. and i can't store this much water, what would i do with this? what would the org do with this, anyway?a few people bought water from us, but we didn't anticipate that many of the patients would be bringing their own baon.

it was nearing 11 am and i was getting desperate. we have to sell the water. no more patients were coming.

i had the idea of selling the water at the nearby tianggian, just beside the parish. so we carried bottles of water (my companions jason and chris hauled the cooler) to the tianggian, only to find out that there weren't too many shoppers, and potential buyers of water.

i told them, why don't we go to the sunken garden? most probably more people would be walking around than in the tianggian. so we hauled the cooler and the water again, took a jeepney ride to vinzons. amae, one of my companions, even tried to sell water to the passengers, but most of them just grinned and chuckled at us.

yep, we were there. i had to muster the courage, charm, and guts to sell water to strangers. it was like jumping inside a well--i wouldn't know how it feels and what it is until i really did it.

at first, we tried to sell the water wholesale to vendors, but they were already selling water, and it came by delivery. ooh, i wanted to give up, because who in the world would buy from us? and isn't selling here without a permit illegal?

but the very customers we wanted were right there in sunken: playing and running in the field like fishes swimming in a pond. we just had to go fishing to reel in our catch. hehe. football players were practicing and playing in sunken.

so we brought our water to sunken grandstand. we conquered a small corner for ourselves. as i learned, location is vital to a business, and we have to bring our products to where our comsumers could easily get them, right? and we would be the nearest water-sellers to them than all our other competition if we stay there, since vendors were teeming all over the place.

peddling water to strangers isn't such an easy task as i thought it would be, after all. i told myself, kaya ko 'to, ano pa bang hindi ko kaya?

i smiled (with all the charm i could gather), carried two bottles of water in my hand, walked up to strangers, and announced, "tubig po. ten pesos lang. pwede pa ang discount." and sweetly tried to peddle and sell like it was my life.

a girl was oblivious that i would be selling so cheap, because these are branded absolute. i told her we just wanted to sell. and she asked how much i would give the water to her if she bought eight. i said, "sige, bili ka ng pito libre isa." that makes p8.75 each. bless her, she did buy seven bottles. i was elated. this is a good omen.

i peddled to the football players, and some i joked with. but it wasn't break time, and some haven't even started playing yet, so one told me, "bumalik kayo 'pag gumagapang na sila."

many of the football players brought along their own water. but the some who didn't, bought from us. during breaks and after they played, we were selling like hotcakes.

and i didn't realize how much thirsty they got after playing until i saw how many one would buy at a time: two or three bottles, every break. what an experience. in just about two hours, we sold out. one even remarked that we should come back at 1.30. but we had no more water to sell, and we would be tired by then.

in the end, we earned even more than what we thought we could. i don't want to count figures in public, but we underestimated how much we could earn.

we joked among ourselves, if this was so lucrative, why don't we come back every weekend? we could even add gatorade, extra joss, rush, etc., to our list of products. haha.

this experience taught me that in business, patience is a virtue. waiting for two hours just to sell every bottle of water we had don't amount to much after we sold out. and the bonding experience was something else, too. i shared jokes while we were waiting for someone to buy from us, and near-tears when i thought we couldn't sell even just one bottle, with my friends.

and does counting cute football players count, too? hehe.

my template is back!

yahooo! with a little tinkering, it's finally back in order. hehehe...
i panicked for no reason.
i'm now off to sleep. med mission tomorrow at UP (or later today? it's nearing dawn), and have to be there really early.

my old skin is gone!

something happened to my old blog skin (waaaaaaaahuhuhuhu) and i hate it.
*sanipriya crying*
i reverted back to the old skin, but of course i'd like to think the last one was better.
huhuhu. why did this happen?
i want the last one back. huhuhu...

ranting

wtf!? i just wrote a new post and when i published it, only the first line was there! where in hell did my post go?

oh forget it. anyway it's just trash.

tomorrow or on friday i'd like to see happy feet, hope it's still in theaters. dreamgirls is also getting good reviews, and eddie murphy might be up for an oscar for that. i'd like to see jennifer hudson (she was in american idol way back), too!

was it three weeks ago that people mag named (yet again) george clooney sexiest man alive? ooh, brad pitt did a payback for that by putting up this ad in variety:

just goes to show that even sexy men once needed makeovers. hehe.