"Je vis de bonne soupe, et non de beau langage."
i have read a quite a few fine words that have made me think and want life just so to walk on that quest for life-changing wisdom (well, not really life-changing, but still...).
it's not so much the material needs and wants that make me go on this life day by day, but it's simply the pleasure of knowing more and experiencing more than what i did the day before. it's not the carnal pleasures (although they help) that make me want to survive another grueling hour in this research-filled life, but the wisdom attained as i go on treading another thorny rose-bush path.
i love the fine words; they are the treasures of a seemingly poverty-stricken youth. i have so much to see and to know that it overwhelms me, somehow, to think that there is more to be known than what i already know: that the billions of people know something i don't. phenomenologically speaking, that is, their experience of the world cannot compare to mine.
the people's fine treasure chest of words. this is my drive. to fill the need of knowing what and how they know and sense what is to me the incomprehensible.
the good food may be my fuel for waking up each day and surviving every step, but it is the fine words that keep me wanting to move and work: it is the engine.
i don't wonder anymore why i'm still in research, haggard though as it is. what i wonder, really, is how i can still be alive, since i haven't really eaten since yesterday because i can't pull myself away from reading, writing, analyzing...